Girls love SuperFriendZoning
Fact: girls can be your friends and nothing more
It’s true, we don’t have to (rather, we don’t get to) sleep with every girl we are close to. And that’s absolutely fine for friendship’s sake. Really, it’s fine. It’s okay. It’s cool. I didn’t even want to anyway. Who needs random seemingly awesome sex from familiar people you are attracted to anyway.
Certainly not Batman. Batman bro-zoned himself with this sexy purrfect flexible babe who loves to run around in tights. Her outfit even comes with cat-ears and a whip that goes whootishhhh! She constantly drags her nails along his armored chest and says flirty little things like “meow” and “hello, mister tall, dark and broody!!” And what does Mr. Detective do? Nothing! Because Selina Kyle is nothing more than a frenemy of his.
Catwoman has nine lives. Catwoman, still has nine lives. Why? Because Batman keeps catching grenades and jumping in front of trains for her, the moment she so much as chips a nail. And that’s exactly what bro-zoned fellas do. No matter how compatible they are, or how very single they are, sometimes, girls and boys can just be friends.
So if Batman can do it, we can all enjoy that special part in a woman’s life reserved for re-assuring her that she is wanted. Let her call you her Bro-Friend. Sit back and watch her go out with a thousand douche-bags … wipe the tears she runs to your shoulder with … listen to her exciting (only exciting to her) stories of her multiple love adventou… sorry sorry! I cant do this anymore. I f***ing love these girls who put me in this zone and my only rewards are home-cooked meals from their mums.
Screw it. It’s not true. Men and Women can’t just be friends. Men and Women are meant to mate, no matter what Batman says … Batman is gay … or has no Batballs under that utility belt. Calendar man should help him figured out exactly when he lost them. Please Superman, throw Batman in the phantom-zone. It has to be better than the friend-zone.
Re-fact: girls being your friends and nothing more will drive you insane … so insane you’ll be an enemy of Batmayne
p.s: My catwoman is from the Arkhamverse, not from the Nolanverse or the new Justice League of America comics where she dies in issue #4 … 🙂